Pleats Please – Why you need pleated skirts in your wardrobe right now.

  1. Lily and Lionel 2. Vero Moda, 3. Weekday 4. Asos Design, 5. Cami NYC 6. Cami NYC, 7. Asos, 8. Asos Design, 9. Filippa K, 10. Chloé, 11. London Rebel, 12 COS  (adlinks)

Pleated skirts has been around for a while now. But it’s only recently they are actually becoming more fun and less basic.

My favorite is when they mix colours and patterns. Even though I have to admit my pink metallic skirt is the one I by far use most often. In the summer I match it with sandals and t-shirts and now in fall, I swap for boots, jumpers, and blouses.

The pleated skirt is actually the perfect wardrobe basic to use all year around. Especially if you find a slightly longer version in “your”color. I love myself a powdery pastel. So the pink skirt in the picture above is very me. I would match it with the white top with long sleeves, the blue bag, and white booties. Such a great outfit!

Pleated skirts are also great for when you have to go from daytime to night without changing too much. Just swap flat shoes for heels, remove the jumper and wear with a cute lace top and bag. Add some lipstick et voila, you are ready for a night out.

Isn’t it interesting how red and pink used to be an absolute no-no in the olden days? And now we know they create magic together. The same with matching black with blue and brown with orange. To add little red hearts on a base of pink is genius. I would personally wear it with red boots and a big pink cozy turtleneck jumper.

Rules in fashion are always there to be broken.

Do you remember any other color combinations that you “shouldn’t” mix that actually look amazing together? 

 

Mindful Monday 15th October

Jumper – River Island, trousers – Asos Design, sneakers – Puma. Location – The Seine in Paris. Photographer – Ida Zander.

Hello, Monday. Hello, new week. Hello, new challenges!

I fel like a new person after our weekend  “off”. It was incredibly beneficial for my sanity to just get to be me and plan my own time for a little while. I know the other girls needed it as much as I did. It was actually the first time Josefina slept away from Leo. So a massive treat for all of us. You guys who have kids know the difference between sleeping with one ear open and to actually get to relax properly.

Garth and Ace had a great weekend together. And even though I was up with him 3 times last night, I still feel well-rested today.

This is my weekly affirmation, mantra, goal, and dreams :

The mantra of the week – ”I can do anything, but not everything”. We have to remember that we only have so much capacity. We can do anything we want as long as we don’t hurt anyone else of course. But That doesn’t mean we should be doing everything. If we do bits and bobs here and there we will never truly focus on or finish anything. It’s much better to choose a few larger goals to focus on and to do those properly.

The affirmation of the week – ” If I talk about it, it’s a dream. If I visualize it, it’s a goal, if I schedule it, it will become reality.” The trick to making those big dreams into goals and eventually a reality is to break it down in smaller pieces. Start by talking about it, visualize and let marinate for a while before you make a plan. This way you won’t feel as overwhelmed.

The goal of the week – To keep the inner calm I feel right now. Yesterday I felt so relaxed that I actually went to bed at 10. 25-years old I would have been shocked! I have always been a bit of a night owl. But now when I have to get up between 6 and 7 every morning, and most likely once or twice every night, 10 is a pretty decent time to go to bed. So my goal is to stay relaxed and go to bed in a good time.

The dream of the week – An Aston Martin DB11. I have been in love with their cars since I did a shoot for them in Mallorca 2008. It’s not really a family car and not cheap either. So, for now, it’s a dream…that could become a goal… and …

The vision of the week – Josefina, Bex and I wake up in the morning, look outside and find a light snowfall over the mountains. We make a big breakfast, dress warm, get our skis and head for the lifts. I never really fancied girls trips before, but after this weekend I understand exactly what they are all about. I now know I need at least 1 or 2 trips with the girls every year. To get to disconnect and just laugh for a while.

The focus of the week – Health and happiness. I’m refusing to get stressed and will take everything as it comes. What gets done gets done and the rest can wait. I will prioritize important and fun things and the smaller stuff can wait.

The event of the week– On Wednesday I’m a guest on a podcast and I also have a nice breakfast with a brand I like in the morning. I have slowly but surely started attending certain events again, if I feel like they fit my schedule and mood.

The lesson from last week – We all need to just be on our own now and then. It’s important to feel like we are in control of our own lives. There needs to be time to take care of both body and mind. I didn’t realize until now how much I needed a break for my sanity.

My everyday luxury this week – I’m going to the hairdresser on Saturday. I used to find it a bit boring to just sit for hours on end. Now I can’t wait to read a magazine, have my hair washed and just be on my own for a bit. And on top of all of this, I get to walk out with great hair. Win-win!

The inspiration of the week – Lady Gaga. I already love her to bits. Her passion, dedication, drive and view of life. And when I found this clip I fell even harder. She is just so damn wise.

Find last week’s affirmation, mantra, goal, and dreams here

 

My Paris Guide #4

Jumper – Neon Rose, trousers – Asos Design, heels – Pierre Hardy & bag – Chanel. (adlinks) Photographer – Ida Zander.

Now when we have been to Paris yet again, I feel like I can make a ” My Paris mini guide #4.”

We don’t really do as much eating out and touriststing when we got Ace, but we still go quite often. So it’s better than I do a few smaller guides than one big one.  Then you can just pick your favorites from all of them.

We lived – In a lovely Air BnB on Rue d’Amsterdam. you can find the ad here.  Big and old with loads of charm.

We ate – at loads of little corner restaurants for lunch. There is a street called Rue Cadet, in the 9th district. There you have little cute restaurants all the way down the road. It’s really quaint. In the evenings we ordered Deliveroo to the Air BnB, because of Ace and his bedtime.

The one night we actually went out for dinner we chose the restaurant at Grands Boulevard hotel. They make a heavenly chocolate mousse.

Vi drank – On Grands Boulevards hotel’s gorgeous little rooftop. The bar is called “The Shed” and is actually a shed. You order your drinks in the measurements “no shed” (alcohol-free), “one shed” (one shot) , “two shed” (double) or “three shed” (triple). Kind of fun and with a great atmosphere. I highly recommend a visit!

We shopped – I got a jumper from my favorite brand Maje. You can find them all over Paris, but this time I chose their shop in Montmartre since they also have a small outlet section with lots of lovely items half price.

We also had a quick look at all the lovely jewelry at the famous “Place Vendôme”. I mean, it’s crazy expensive (a girl can dream right?), but you still have to go for the experience. My favorite is the “Alhambra” shop by Van Clee and Arpels.  Then we headed down to Rue Saint Honoré and looked in shops like Max Mara and Dior.

Don’t forget to check out the beautiful little flower shop that only sells roses that’s attached to hotel Costes. 

We touristed – At the Eiffel tower. But this time we saw it from the side (like in the photos) and we also too Ace and his little friend Leon to the playground behind the Eiffel tower. The kids have never played with such a view before. It’s stunning. Defo one for the mamas. We also saw Sacre Coeur when we had a little walk around Montmartre the last morning.

This time we took it pretty chill and more tried to “live” in Paris than visit. It was really relaxed and nice. I would have liked to go to one more dinner. Next time. I got my eye on a couple of restaurants I fancy trying out.

You can find my Paris mini guide #1 here, my Paris mini guide #2 here och my Paris mini guide #3 här.

 

Bloglovin’ & Backdated blog posts

Photo – Ida Zander

Yay! Now you can finally find both my English and my Swedish blog on Bloglovin’.

It has really taken a long time and a massive amount of emails, but finally it seems to be sorted. So please feel free to follow my English blog here;

Follow my blog with Bloglovin

As you probably have noticed, I don’t have an archive here on this blog yet. It would be impossible for me to separate the English and the Swedish text in every post I have made in the last 3 years. However, I am considering paying someone to do it for me.

Have anyone of you had any experience with virtual assistants?

It’s an easy job, but it will take quite some time. It’s basically just copying, moving over and deleting the English part of every post. I would guess it’s at least 1 000 posts, maybe even 2 000, so it might take a while. But it would be worth it don’t you think?

 

Interview – Prêt à Pregnant

Earlier this week I sat on the Eurostar on my way back from Paris. Ace fast asleep in the buggy and me frenetically typing away on my phone.

In a 30-minute nap window, I managed to jot down an article on a subject very dear to me – Babies, working mothers, and influencing.

I have to admit it’s not the most well-worked piece I have ever written, but it’s straight from the heart. The lovely ladies at Prêt à Pregnant asked me to describe my experience as a mother with a baby at Fashion Week.

You can read the full article here.

I find it very surprising that there are so few babies and children at fashion week in general. Most of us in this business range from in their late twenties up to sixties and beyond. The spread is big age-wise, but the one thing we have in common is that at least 75% of the guests are women. And I bet there are quite a few children kicking about at home.

I guess some kids would be in nursery or school during the days, but what about the new mothers like me? We who have babies under 1 and possibly might even still be breastfeeding? In a business where it’s notoriously hard to take maternity leave – why not bring them along? Sure I get the point of infants mixing with noise, people and music. But when they are 6 months and up, if they would enjoy it, why not take them with?

I worry it has to do with perception. That there is no room for “human” things like kids in fashion. That kids aren’t “cool” and that moms are even more uncool.

That in fashion, no one wants to be “the mom”. 

I hope it has to do with me-time. That some of us see it as a great opportunity to have some grown-up time. Then I get it fully. And if you can afford a nanny, then hells yeah, go for it. Get your fashion on Mama.

But for those of us who have no choice. If we want to go, we have to bring them with (I traveled alone from London to attend Stockholm fashion week. It was with or not at all.).

I really hope the sight of Ace and me at the shows encourage more new moms in my industry to feel comfortable enough to bring their babies to shows, events, or meetings. Obviously only if it’s child-appropriate and you are comfortable. You know your baby and situation best.

Just know that you are allowed, no one is going to look at you weirdly (well, they might, but screw them!), you don’t have to choose one or the other. You can do both.

In this modern society, where we know we deserve to both have a career and a family. Isn’t it’s a bit crazy that our female-dominated industry doesn’t cater to us?

 

The Flat Above – How I decorate with posters

The code”TESS25” will give you 25% discount at Desenio between October 9-11* Follow @Desenio for more inspiration. *The code is not valid on frames or handpicked-/collaboration posters.

The flat above is really starting to take shape now.

As you probably know by now, we bought the flat above ours here in Clapham. We first did a fairly large renovation and now I’m decorating it. The idea is to rent it out in the future. We prefer to rent it out furnished since it gives us the option to Air BnB it in-between tenants.

At the moment our friends Bex and Luke live there with their little 1-year old boy Milo. They are renovating and extending their own flat, and is staying at ours until it’s all done. It has worked out really well, I didn’t have to rush the decorations and got all the furniture in place as they arrived.

The other weekend when Ace was sleeping, Garth and I snuck upstairs and added the finishing touches – the artwork. 

It’s meant to be a rental, so it has been important for us to keep the furniture clean, classic, tasteful and with items most people hopefully would like. We didn’t want to spend any huge sums, but still find the absolute best within our budget.

How suitable isn’t a collaboration with my beloved Desenio?  I already have lots of posters from them downstairs in our flat and I love them. They have a massive selection, and you don’t have to empty out your wallet either. Since they are fairly inexpensive I just switch them out if I get tired of them. Perfect!

Ready for loads of pictures of the flat upstairs and what I chose to put on the walls? It’s really easy to decorate with posters.

In the living room, I chose a palette of grey, petroleum, and brass. Little details like plants, tiles inside the fireplace, a big round mirror and two matching posters over the dining table make it look decorated. But also leaves room for personal touches by whoever will live here later.

The posters I chose for the living room are called “Into the blue” and “Blue tide”. 

In the UK it’s common to have hallways in our homes. In Sweden, you usually have to walk through rooms to get to other rooms. The nice things with hallways are that they are really easy to decorate. We just added a cabinet on the wall and all of a sudden we have both extra storage and a lovely surface to decorate. 

Here I chose to work with petroleum, grey, and white. I also added a few little details in a dusty pink color.

I love these little areas in a home. It’s where your personality can afford to show through in your decorations. Depending on what you choose to put in the frames and display, this space can change completely. You can also move stuff around for different seasons. 

In these frames, you find  “Dancer one”, “Pink oyster pattern one” and “Aquarelle shape” from Desenio. 

In the master bedroom, I kept the same palette, but I added navy blue and more dusty pink details. Instead of placing my artwork over the bed, I chose to hang them beside it instead. It’s a bit less expected and a lot more intersting. I love how they reflect in the mirrored wardrobe. It makes the whole room look bigger.

Flowers as a motif in a bedroom gives a nice calming effect. I love that these pictures aren’t cute but have more depth. It really works with the rest of the decor in the room.

The posters in this room are called “Spaceflower” and “Gardenflower”. 

Last but not least I added 3 posters in a row in the hallway at the entrance. It’s quite a sterile and hard space. So to add some colorful artwork here really makes a big difference to the feel of the room.

I chose more of a vintage feeling this time.

The hallway is all white and has a grey carpet, so I felt like it needed a bit of a color pop. The pictures make me want to go on holiday and I hope that the person who lives here later will love them as much as I do. Otherwise, I will steal them for the downstairs instead.

These posters are “French riviera”, “American Vintage car”, and “Pool edge”. 

…I couldn’t keep myself from getting a little something for our own flat. My little blog office really needed something inspirational on the wall. My unofficial motto is “Be water” and I really think this photo embodies this. Very inspiring!

I even ordered a few of the frames from Desenio. It was totally practical, all I had to do was to put them on the walls. Simples!

How gorgeous isn’t “Beach aerial one”?

So what do you think of the flat upstairs so far? Do you want me to show you more? It’s a bit different to decorate to rent than when you live in it yourself. 

This post is sponsored by Desenio.

 

Mindful Monday 8th October

Dress – Asos, belt – Moschino, bag – Saint Laurent (liknande), sneakers – Adidas. (adlinks) Location – South Bank. Photographer – Ida Zander.  

Omg guys, I just had a look at my English blog and realized I only posted 2 (!) posts here last week. It’s meant to be 6!
I’m so sorry, it was just one of those weeks where I lost my life-balance. Between a sick baby and going to Paris I basically just ran out of time. Since my Swedish blog is the bigger one, I had to prioritize writing over there.
The reason I post here 6 times and on the Swedish one 9 times a week is that the blogging culture is slightly different in UK and Sweden. UK readers are more interested in learning something from a blog post, “how to” “this is why” and post in that kind of style. You guys seem to prefer to come away with something new from every post.
When I was nominated in UK blog awards I was basically told they would barely even score my blog because of the number of everyday posts I put up. And that kind of sucked.
The Swedes, on the other hand, are more interested in me as a person. They want to know what I’m up to, how my day has been and all the little things.
To solve the dilemma of the two different styles. I decided to separate the two blogs and make 6 proper posts here and 9, with a couple of more every-day posts over there.
However last week was not how it was meant to go. So please forgive me for neglecting you, my English-speaking friends. It won’t happen again.

It’s time for this week’s mantra, affirmation, dreams, and goals;

My mantra of the week – “Everything is figureoutable”. Sometimes it takes a bit of thinking, but that’s life. Most things can be solved if you really put your mind to it. If things were easy all the time, than life would be pretty boring. We would never appreciate anything because everything would be a win. So it’s worth to remember, when faced with a problem, that this is how we grow. It will, in the end, make us happier to have overcome this obstacle.

My affirmation of the week – “I’m a super-talented go-getter that never lets anything get in my way”. Let’s turn that inner critical voice into a really energetic and over-excited cheerleader. Pompoms and all! Let her jump, dance and sing every morning. It might feel a bit weird in the beginning, but at least you will start the day with a smile on your face.

My goal of the week – Balance. As mentioned, I lots it last week. First of all I need to be kinder to myself. To fee bad won’t make any difference, all I can do is to promise myself that this week will be better. I actually have an extra half-day to work on Friday, since Ace’s nursery was closed one day a few weeks ago so he will go on Friday morning too. It will be interesting to see what a few more workhours will do for my week.

My dream of the week – The Maldives. I have never been and really badly want to go. I want to live in one of those little houses on poles in the water, swim in the blue ocean and walk along those bright white beaches I would go next year if I could, but it’s probably better to wait until Ace will actually appreciate it for real.

My vision of the week – Burning man! This vision will happen, I’m going to make sure of it. I met up with my friend Tiffany and her little boy Leon in Paris. We actually know each other from LA and both of us really long to go over there with our boys. So since Tiff was the one who showed me how to sneak into Coachella, it wouldn’t be more than right for us two to leave the boys with the boys and head off to burning man for a day or two.

My focus of the week – I have to be kinder to myself. I’m always striving to do my absolute best, most of the time on the detriment of my on mental health. I need to learn how to focus on what I have accomplished and not on what I didn’t do. It’s hard to make that nagging little critical voice go away. But this week I’m really going to try to shut her down.

The event of the week– This Friday Josefina, Bex and I are heading out on the countryside to have a “mom-weekend”. We decided already when we were pregnant that we deserved some time away once the babies turned one. To celebrate that we kept them alive for a full year. Go ahead an laught. But honestly sometimes having the responsibility of another person’s life can be quite overwhelming. So we deserve a good celebration.

We are going out to Bex’s parent’s house. the plans so far is to drink wine, read books, go for walks and just talk and talk. No baby chat allowed, it’s a “baby-detox”.

My lesson from last week – I cannot put my head in the sand whenever I can’t make my time stretch far enough. Garth did work every day we were in Paris. But I’m pretty sure I could have got him to take Ace for an hour or two so I could sit in a hotel lobby and write a post. I have to get better at asking for help when I can’t make it on my own.

The every-day luxury of the week – This week I’m going to be a lot better at keeping work, mom-time and downtime separate. Tonight I’m turning off my phone and computer at 8. I’m going to have a shower, watch a movie and eat pho. It will be my reward for a good work day today.

My inspiration this week– This speech by Steve Jobs at the Stanford commencement 2005 really resonated with me. Especially since I have been to uni, but chose to travel the world with modeling instead. Steve Jobs is an inspiring guy in general. But I really took to heart what he said about “being dead soon”. I’m going to carry that thought with me from now on.

 

Why you need a red power-suit

Suit – Y.A.S. Bag – Saint Laurent, similar here. Jumper – old, similar here. Heels – Zara old. Earrings – River Island.  (adlinks) Photo – Ida Zander.

Who says a suit has to be black, grey, navy or beige? I much prefer this red power-suit personally.

The cut is pretty casual to be fair and I matched it with a cozy turtleneck to make it fell-appropriate. But it would look just as good in an office with a nice silky top under.

If men do red power-ties, why not a red power-suit?

The trousers are slightly flared and it lends the whole look a bit of a 70s vibe. Whilst I get a bit of help with the illusion of slightly longer legs. Can you even have too long legs? Have you ever heard anyone complain about having legs up to their ears? Me neither.

I have this thing with red at the moment. It’s a color that stands out and takes up space. You cannot apologize in red, it’s all – ” I’m here no matter you like it or not”.

The contrast to the black jumper and the gold earrings makes it even more interesting visually. I actually think gold and red are a match made in heaven. And not only for Christmas.

This is a proper “Don’t you dare mess with me” – outfit. For those days when you need a bit extra power (or just to be a bit extra in general).

Can we take a moment to appreciate this location btw? It’s the jetty by The London Eye at South bank in London. Ida and I shot here last week and it’s just a great visual with all those white beams.

We did get told off and eventually had to leave. But to be fair, the ferry guys were kind enough to let us finish taking our photos first.

Good thing Ida and I are a great team. We can shoot an outfit in minutes if we have the right location. I can’t wait for her to arrive here in Paris tomorrow. There are so many cool locations around!

If you want to know what I have been up to, check out my Insta stories. I’m showing off our Air BnB (it’s awesome), what I fancy in the shops (it’s expensive) and also my best mom hack when traveling with a baby. You can find me here @TessMontgomery

 

Mindful Monday – 1st October

Today I’m working from here – our kitchen. Ace has been ill over the weekend, so I’m working from home with a nice cup of tea, a great playlist and a sleeping baby in the buggy (the bed was not just an option today for some reason). 

He had a temperature Saturday night and is actually a lot better today. But if I expect other parents to be careful with their kids and bugs, then I will have to do the same. So we are aiming for 24 h fever free before he goes back to the nursery. I know not every parent have the same opportunity to stay at home, I’m lucky my work is flexible and that I have the opportunity to keep him with me for the day.

These are my affirmations, mantras, visions, and goals for the week;

The mantra of the week – ”Positivity is not the same as being ignorant or naive”. Some people seem to mistake happy, kind and positive with naivity and softness. I have actually noticed that it’s the other way around. The people who are seriously clued in are the ones who deal with life in a positive way. They always seem to come out on top.

Veckans affirmation – ” I welcome a new week and all the opportunities and experiences it will bring” I need this affirmation today because just looking at my calendar makes me feel a bit tired.

On Wednesday we are heading off to Paris again. Garth is finishing off a job there and has to stay for a week. So it makes sense for Ace and me to join him from Wednesday to Sunday. But before then I have lots to do – a collaboration to shoot, another one to plan, a draft to send in, some important emails to write, calls to make, errands to run, problems to solve, washing, packing and preparing to travel with a baby again. It will be fine, but I will continue to repeat this affirmation today and things will hopefully all fall into place.

The goal of the week – To finish all my admin before we leave for Paris on Wednesday. So I can focus on enjoying myself and my family. This time we have an Air BnB, and it will make it all a bit easier. Ace is walking now, so we need a bit more space. And we will have a kitchen to be able to cook and eat after he has gone to bed.

The dream of the week – A jacuzzi. My dad got one at the house and I love it. Just the ritual of taking the time to pour the water, light the candles, choose a playlist and pick a book makes me relax. It would be amazing to get to have a mini-spa every Sunday night, to prepare for the week ahead.

The vision of the week – I wake up early, the rest of the house is still fast asleep. I throw on my workout gear, get on my bike and hed for the gym. Crossfit or yoga depending on the day, but most importantly I wil start the day in a really positive way. I have never been one to do morning work-outs. I quite frankly find it discusting to work out before breakfast and prefer to stay in bed. But I have come to terms with the fact that the monrings probably is the best time for me to sneak off. I’m hoping if I visualize this enough times then hopefully one day it won’t feel like a punishment anymore.

The focus of the week – I want to plan my autumn this week. We have Paris booked in this weekend. The one after I’m heading out on the countryside with Bex and Josefina for a baby-free weekend to celebrate we managed the first years as mothers. But after that, it looks pretty free until Christmas and I want to fill it with fun stuff.

The event of the week – Paris again! I’m almost french soon…(bonjour.) This time my lovely photographer Ida will join us Friday to Sunday so we can both hang out and take a few photos. Maybe I can even get that elusive husband of mine to end up on a photo or two!

The lesson from last week – We will be sick a lot in the next few months. I need to keep this in mind when I plan ahead. Hopefully, there are a set number of colds we need to go through before Ace’s immune system is strong enough to cope with all the nursery bugs.

The everyday luxury of the week–  I have a weird sugar habit at the moment One month I don’t want any and the next I just want to eat dark chocolate all day long. My solution to this is to get a set number of really nice chocolates each week to divide over 7 days. I’m hoping this will make sweet stuff more of a special treat than something I reach for when I need a bit of extra energy.

The inspiration of the week – Is actually Garth! Or something he did yesterday. I noticed something was different. For once he was answering my questions with full sentences, he was actually talking to me and seemed to want to hang out. At first, I thought someone had switched my sullen husband for some charming man I didn’t know, but then I found out why. Apparently, you can lock yourself out of certain apps on your phone after a set number of hours spent on them in a day. Obviously, Garth underestimated how much time he spends on these apps since he got locked out already by the early afternoon.

This is a great feature and it will do wonders for a lot of marriages.

 

OMG I hate Mom-shaming

mom-shaming och kritik från föräldrar

Photo – Ida Zander

God, I hate Mom-shaming. It’s when other people (most of the time other parents) make someone else feel bad about the choices they make for their children.

I had no idea how much some parents compare their kids before I had children of my own. Some mothers seem to almost be competing in who is the better parent. It’s quite scary!

”So your child goes to nursery? Well, I have a private nanny so little Ralphie won’t get fleas from the other children”
”You give your child grains before they are one year old? We don’t believe in grains and would never give it to our little Ralphie”. 
”Your nursery don’t serve Organic? We only give Ralph 100% organic food. He deserves the absolute best and nothing else”
”I protect my little angel from illness by staying at home with him 24/7. It’s just one of the sacrifices you do if you love your child”. 
”Children who go to nursery before they are 3 years old will have severe social problems in the future… (quotes random source)”
”What, you mix Swedish and English at home? You can only speak Swedish with him at home if you want him to learn!”.
”What you mix Swedish and English at home? He will fall behind in school if he doesn’t have the full English vocabulary in the future.”

…these are just a handful of things I have heard in the last few weeks. And it makes me sooo tired. It’s never straightforward either, more like snide passing comments.

Next time I get one of these little digs from another Mom I will look them straight in the eye and say –  ”YOU DO YOU. ”

Having children is not a competition! So what if your kid can’t run when it’s 10 months old. It’s not like they will grow up running weird as adults. Fed is better than starving because the breastfeeding isn’t working. Work or not, it’s up to your family constellation, plans for the future and economy.

All parents and children have different opportunities and needs, as long as you do your best, you are a good parent.

Mom-shaming is just incredibly unnecessary and surprisingly common. Sometimes I feel like people only say these things to make themselves feel better.
I mean I cook 90% of Aces food, all organic. Still, someone told me they were “surprised” that Ace got an (organic) pouch when we were out. Apparently, her little child would never even taste it… Nothing is good enough if you start listening to everyone else.

There is no such thing as the perfect parent.

Then if we add all the latest reports on this and that. Immunisations – normal, slow or not at all. Screentime, plastic toys etc.. It would be a full-time job just to keep updated with the latest research (and who is behind it). As if you don’t have enough to think about as a parent.

I believe in common sense and gut feeling.

You know your child and you will do your best based on your situation. And if your child is healthy, happy, fairly clean and is reaching all their milestones in time. Chances are you are doing a pretty good job. But to turn yourself inside out trying to please other Moms is only silly.

So you Moms who know what I’m talking about and live with this too. Ignore or say stop. Ask what they mean and why they chose to bring this subject up at this very moment. I have a feeling that if you lift the comment to the surface then you will either get a proper discussion or at least fewer digs in the future.

I actually expected a lot of Mom-shaming here on the blog. But you guys have been the most supportive of everyone. Thank you, you are awesome <3.